Embracing Life & the Child with the Disease

Random D Thoughts

Today . . .

We woke up late for church . . . but arrived 30 minutes early.

Ryan was nervous about going to a Sunday School class where no one knew he had diabetes.  So we told him he could go to Sunday School then we’d pick him up and he could go to big church with us.  Since we got there early, we had the opportunity to visit with the Children’s Pastor.  When I told him Ryan was an insulin dependent diabetic, he said he was diabetic too.  I called Ryan over and said that Mr. P had D too trying to help him relax, to make a connection.  He walked over, looked Mr. P right in the face and said, “Type 1 or Type 2?” 

Does anyone else think that response is funny?  (He’s T2, by the way, but was also taking insulin at one point.  But he is managing his diabetes better and is only taking pill now . . . good for Mr. P!)

But that created a connection between Mr. P and Ryan.  He started calling Ryan “George.”  Ryan corrected him several times, but seemed to love the joking a little more every time.  By the time I picked him up, he didn’t even correct the name.  Just accepted George with a grin.  And I loved that!

But Ryan didn’t want me to pick him up.  He and Aaron wanted to stay and go to Kids Church.  So, I checked his sugar, gave the appropriate correction (high, 216) and went on to “Big Church” leaving Ryan and Aaron sitting with friends from school and watching Looney Toons on the big screen. 

We went to Country Burger for lunch and he had chicken strips and fries for lunch.  Fries are the worst for Ryan.   THE WORST!!!  I didn’t extend the bolus this time, which I thought I’d gotten pretty good at doing.  But I simply forgot, totaled the carbs and “confirmed.”  STINK!!!!

Well, a few hours later . . . 127.  Somehow, without explanation, I have no idea why . . . I hate that usually . . . but it worked.  And today, I don’t care that I don’t know why.  I’m just happy with the 127.  I’ll be frustrated about it next time he has fries and I don’t know what to do.  LOL (sorta)

Jason and I went to a JDRF Family Committee meeting.  I’m going to be on the family committee this year helping families set up their teams for the Walk in Plano on September 24.  There is always, for me, something very emotional about gathering like that.  There is a same-same comfort but it is emotional.  I listened to stories.  One in particular was VERY sad and moving.  It will stay with me for days.  I will pray for that man, that father.  His heart was on his sleeve too.  He was so transparent and real.  I appreciated that.  It made me more emotional. 

I’m praying already that this year’s Walk will be better for us . . . for me.  Last year, our first year, it was very emotional and H.A.R.D.  I was in a terrible mood plastering a smile on my face for Ryan.  It was rainy and wet.  It just totally broke my heart that we were there because of/for my son.  I do NOT say that in arrogance.  I say it most humbly.  But who wants to be participating in a fundraiser/benefit raising money to find a cure for a currently incurable disease because your son has that incurable disease?  People grieve at different rates, at different paces, in different ways and my grieving process is sloooowwwwwww.  I’m still there in that grieving place.  But I’m just praying that God provides some healing this year on September 24 and in the days leading up to that day as I try to serve other families trying to participate in the walk .

And there you have it.  My random D thoughts for today.


Comments on: "Random D Thoughts" (9)

  1. Love these random thoughts you have as I often feel them right along with you. I too think Ryan’ type 1 or 2 question is funny as I often think the same question. I know S will probably say the same thing at some point. My first encounter with other D families was 10 months after S was diagnosed at a Halloween party. I signed she and I in and immediately broke down in tears. S didn’t understand, she was only 3 at the time and I didn’t want to explain that to her either. I pulled myself together and we continued through with red, teary eyes. But I/we got through it and 3.5 years after diagnosis I help and hold the hand of those newly diagnosed.

    Good luck with your walk and helping other families fund raise. I too have become our Family Walk Chair and our walk is just a week before yours. If you have questions feel free to let me know. I will be thinking about you during your walk this year.

    Thank you for your thoughts and insight!

    • Sarah, you are one of my favorite commenters. You are so uplifting and encouraging to me. I love that. I need that. It’s good to be able to give ourselves permission to grieve. To be moved whether in saddness or pride in reaching and passing a mile-marker. To just be allowed to cry because life is hard with d. I don’t LIVE there. I live, or strive to, live in the positive. But it would a lie to say that my heart doesn’t get heavy at times. I’ll be thinking of walking too. And I will def come to you with quesitons. You are a supa d-momma and I heart you!!! ❤

  2. Mrs. b. said:

    went and marked my calendar for sure this Sept. 24th..nothing will get in the way this time.
    Love you and thanks for being REAL.
    Praying Blessings upon you and yours daily,
    Mrs. b.

  3. Fred told me that story you’re referring to when he got home. It still hurts my stomach thinking about it. I am so glad you are helping out on the committee. I know you will be a blessing to families that are in the position you were in last year.

    Looking forward to Wednesday!

  4. You’ll stand at that finish line and realize just how far you’ve come….and that will keep happening year after year after year.

    Keep up the great work!

  5. I totally get that feeling that washes over you at the Walk…I had it the first year. Also, I get emotional in trying to rally the troops on behalf of Joe and in trying to educate why a cure and why just being there in person on Walk Day is so very important to us…to all people with type 1. Sometimes I feel my IRL friends (non D’ers) don’t necessarily “get” it…it makes me feel “alone” yet again in this journey.

    But, I have my boots up and am in the midst of Walk Season right now…ordering BB T-shirts this week.

    Tell “GEORGE” HI from me!!! 😉

  6. Heather said:

    I agree our first walk was really hard too. I have a feeling this years will be hard all over again…..

    I love all your random thoughts! 🙂

  7. Jessica said:

    Sept 24th…I’ll be there Amy!! Tell me when and where, and I’ll be there with bells on for Ryan!! Love you!

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